Fresh off our best season to-date, we're jumping into a wacky Week 1 slate with a little hop in our step. Which rookie QBs are going to throw us off right out of the gate?

With the power of a deep state PSYOP behind them, who can stop the Chiefs? Why are the Niners even showing up? Are they in on the Op as well? We won’t waste too much time on the ramblings of lunatics, but we will dig into the numbers to see who we expect to win Super Bowl 58!

Baltimore is one of the best teams ever measured by DVOA, but is that enough to knock Patrick Mahomes out of the playoffs? If there’s no rain to bother the tiny hands of Jared Goff and Brock Purdy, will either offense struggle against defenses with clear deficiencies? Are the Detroit Lions really going to make the Super Bowl?!

They’re heeeeere! It’s been three weeks since we saw Baltimore and San Francisco play their starters, and three weeks is a really long time in the NFL. I haven’t forgotten just how dominant they were all season, but the Vegas lines seem like they have. Throw in Patrick Mahomes getting points and a chance to bet against Baker Mayfield, and this is the easiest weekend we’ve had in weeks! We’ll probably go 0-4, but at least it wasn’t hard to make the picks!

How much of an edge does the better quarterback give you? Is Patrick Mahomes with just Kelce better than Tua with Tyreek and Waddle? Do you like the Lions and their explosive weapons or Matthew Stafford’s YOLO balls? And what do you do with a 38-year old Joe Flacco doing his best 27-year old Joe Flacco impression against the best rookie QB we’ve seen since at least Dak Prescott?